Complications..

On Sunday.. an article in d Berita Minggu caught my eye..
d one about d lady giving birth and was bleeding nonstop after dat.. it reminded me of my birth story...

A yr and 2 months and a few days back..
..i started my maternity leave.. an advance one..so it was 27th March 07.. I missed my mornin check up so i turned up for the evening one...
..Adrian.. upon checking my cervix said that i have to be admitted that night..11pm..hahha
Told him if i can delay.. he said cant coz baby's big.. that made me panic a bit.. but was ok.. n so.. told Sen wat Adrian said.. went Nenek's(Sen's) house a while.. cant remember for wat.. went to the Shengshiong near Aisah's place and got cocnuts..drank it in d car while smsing my aunts mum dad n all about my updates.. was feeling excited n scared at the same time.. went home paced up n down.. pack my e-bag.. n rest.. Sen had his magrib n isyak prayers..tot of going to TMC straight from home..but Mak called n asked to come over n have fishball noodle soup..went over..due to d feeling that i had.. i hadnt been eating anythin ..so had a bit of fishball noodle soup.. made our way to TMC... stopped fer petrol n kitkat..n batteries.. n continued our journey.. parked d car n registered.. while Sen settle the stuffs..i was brought to the delivery ward.. was feeling worried n scared as my support wasnt there.. they put me on the CTG machine.. d midwife/nurse said baby's heartbeat was tacky..didn know wat it meant..Adrian came..checked my cervix and broke my waterbag.. a squirt of enema and before i could say anything i could feel everything comeing out.. rushed to d toilet ...saw trails of blood n d amniotic fluid..came back n was hooked on the CTG machine again.. it was after a while that i was asked to go to the delivery ward.. Sen came..time was about 11.45pm.. the midwives came n put drips n all those things on me.. no pain..still can relax..12am.. no pain..1am.. d contractions start to come slowly.. my cervix was only 2cm...145am.. d contractions start to come hard.. it was painful.. breathe heavily..like how Kak wirdi taught me to do..at every breath i read d surah mariam... with Sen holding my hand.. and reciting some doas for me to follow..used d gas but wanted to puke bcoz of the smell.. time seems to past pretty fast.. i dunno y.. 4am.. d irritating midwife cam and checked me..4cm dilated.. only 4???ah....asked for epidural.. was cryin in pain.. n dissappointment that it was only 4.. d aethe watever came.. he was nice...epidural was.. painless.. hahaha but i keep jerkin.. or rather shiver.. the side effect and Sen was laughing at me.. everytime a contraction or rather contractions came.. Sen had to massage my feet.. hahahah that made me feel better..6am ..7cm..730am.. d midwives.. said i was ready.. tried to push but i couldnt feel d contractions coming.. even when they reduced the epidural..8am Adrian came.. baby didnt wanna come out.. he tried d vacumm and then the forceps.. n baby was delivered at 823am...
i was.. speechless.. d feelings ...i jus cannot describe the feelings.. baby was cleaned up while i was sew down there.. Adrian took a long time n i could actually feel the needle!! ouch!!! finally the whole ordeal ended.. stayed a while in the delivery ward..was tired..after like about 30mins.. iw as wheeled to the ward..

i was ok.. feeling fine..but had no apetite.. cant eat..2 days later was discharged.. it was exciting..having a baby.. looking after him...n all.. i was discharged on wednesday.. on friday morning..i was bleeding blood clots.. n so the whole day i jus lay on d bed and rest..sleep all day long.. was ok in d evening...yantty came n visit..chitchat..gossiped n all..asked around on d blood clots n ppl said oh its the dirty blood thats clearing and its good... saturday i was fine too.. Sunday.. i bled again.. it was terrible..lots n lots of blood.. i fainted..everyone at home panic.. i felt terrible.. Nana called d ambulance..i was cold n shivery.. half concious but was aware of wats happening ard me.. refused to be sent to hosp.. but no choice.. d medics said i was losing lots of blood... reached A n E.. it was a bumpy ride.. d docs on duty fiddled me here and there...i was feeling very cold..two blankets and an additional warm one.. didnt help..was wheeled into the normal ward.. where a prof came and see me.. said that they suspected i had some placenta bits still in my womb and i had to have an op fast..3omins later ther wheeled me into d operating theatre.. i felt terrible.. didnt know if i would survive the op.. cried ..think of Ayubi.. Sen.. my great family.. my grandma,. my aunts..d people in the ops theatre was playing a song by Clay Aiken..soon.. i was unconcious..

..Woke up..heard ppl around me saying that my blood pressure was low.. was asked my name n ic no.. wheeled in d ward.. saw nenek.. nenek mon..auntie..bapak.. n my aunties.. i cried n they cried too..it was so sad..was too tired... so i slept after they left.. woke up n aisah came..but was too tired.. slept abit more.. after everyone left.. just sat wif sen n talked.. cried when he wanted to go home..i felt so..lost..scared..he just hugged me...told me its ok to cry..
i was angry..angry wif adrian..negligence on his part?? i was confused..three days later was discharged..Adrian.. not apologetic at all...i could have died..300grm of placenta in me.. i could have lost everythin and there's no word of sorry from him..nothing..will nvm..mayb he will get his desserts...

but for now.. syukur alhamdullilah i was saved.. i'm still alive.. i can still care for my baby.. my dearest hub...spend time wif my dearest family.. se d passing of my beloved grandma..

but i'm so sorry for Kak Julia's auntie.. d one who was in the article...only 30mins of happiness wif d newborn..n she bled ..organs failed n finally she left the world to see her maker..i was nearly in her position.. al fateha buatnya.. yg telah pergi..